LOST BOYS

As a very proud father of a 9-year-old daughter with a son arriving in a matter of weeks, founder of IGU Global, and partner to a remarkable woman, I’m deeply invested and passionate about the future — of my family, of business, and of humanity. That’s why a recent global conversation about young men stopped me in my tracks.

We are facing a very serious, silent and borderless crisis. It doesn’t matter if you live in London or Lagos, Sydney or São Paulo. Across the world, young men are falling behind, academically, economically, emotionally and many are vanishing from society altogether.

Alarm Bells Are Ringing

• In 50 countries, suicide is the leading cause of death for men under 30.

• South Korea’s birth rate is now just 0.72, the lowest in the world. It’s replacing nurseries with nursing homes.

  
  

• In Japan, over a million young men have withdrawn from society, a generation of “hikikomori” with no job, no education, and no relationships.

  
  

• Across Europe, the US, Australia, NZ and Asia, women are outpacing men in education at every level.

  
  

• In many countries, nearly 1 in 4 young men is neither in education, employment, nor training (NEET).

  
  

These statistics aren’t just numbers, remember these are lives. There are boys out there in increasing numbers that are becoming men without a roadmap, without meaning, and without models for what healthy masculinity even looks like.

We Can’t Ignore the Gendered Cost of Progress

I say this as someone who absolutely celebrates the rise of women. Women’s advancement in education, work, and autonomy is one of humanity’s great achievements. But somewhere along the way, we forgot that lifting one group should never mean abandoning another.

Globally, boys are now more likely to be suspended, diagnosed with learning difficulties, and disengaged from school than girls. They’re more likely to fall into addiction, violence, isolation, or despair. And they’re less likely to reach out for help.

What’s happening isn’t just a cultural shift, it’s a structural breakdown. Young men aren’t lazy or lost by nature. Many are just simply under-equipped for the modern world and unsure of their place in it.

The Masculinity Void

I think when we told men not to be “toxic,” but we didn’t show them what to be instead. And in the vacuum, harmful ideologies have taken root. Across TikTok, YouTube, and fringe communities, millions of boys are absorbing messages of resentment, misogyny, and hollow strength disguised as empowerment.

Meanwhile, the scripts for manhood, the ones that used to come from elders, religious institutions, or local communities are all eroding. And nothing sustainable has replaced them.

So What Do We Do?

As a founder of a company built on the promise of “I Got You,” I believe this is one of the most important human challenges of our time. Not because men are more important, but because they’ve been forgotten in conversations that were supposed to be about everyone.

Here’s what I believe we need, globally:

• More male role models. Coaches, mentors, teachers, uncles, brothers, men who embody strength with kindness, leadership with humility, presence with emotional maturity.

  
  

• Global rites of passage. We need to create new, culturally relevant milestones that help young men transition into adulthood with purpose and pride.

  
  

• Third spaces and peer connection. From Port Moresby to Paris, young men need places to gather offline, to build friendships, find guidance, and learn how to belong without shame.

  
  

• Economic dignity. Every young man deserves a path to contribute, whether through university, skilled trades, entrepreneurship, or national service.

  
  

• Emotional fluency. Emotional resilience, communication, vulnerability, these are not Western ideas or feminine traits. They’re essential human skills.

  
  

Because This Is Not Just a Male Problem

When men disengage, society ultimately pays the price. Families fragment. Communities weaken. Birth rates fall. Workforces shrink. And political polarisation grows as disenfranchised men become easy targets for extremism and grievance.

But when we equip men to rise, not above anyone, but alongside everyone, I promise you we all win.

I want my daughter to grow up in a world where the boys beside her become whole, capable men. That means we need to act now, with empathy followed by compassion, with courage in being vulnerable, and with clarity so we can be disciplined.

There is only one way to write a new global script for masculinity and that is together. One that transcends culture, borders, and politics. One that doesn’t ask men to be less, but invites them to become more.

Because they’re not lost. They’re just waiting to be led home.

Nick Gray